INTERVIEW WITH AUTHORS TONY AND PENNY MONETTI

I’m Anne Bronkema, and as an intern for Discovery House Publishers, I recently had the opportunity to interview Called to Serve authors Lt. Col. Tony and Penny Monetti. I was given a lot of liberty as to what to discuss with them, so I asked them questions about things in their life that interested me. I hope these topics interest you as well!

Did you know that, in addition to Tony being a B-2 stealth bomber pilot, Tony and Penny also own an Italian restaurant in Missouri? Find out this and more about their fascinating life, and glean from their wisdom as I did. Read on!

Annie: Hi, Tony and Penny! To begin, what does a typical day looks like in your home, or is there such a thing?

Penny: (laughing) That doesn’t exist. A typical day is just busy-ness. I’ve always thought that it was going to calm down as my children got older, but life just speeds up! To have a peaceful day, I really need to start with prayer, and Tony and I do that. We also read Proverbs together every day. Then we ask each other how we can pray for the other, and by doing that we stay in tune with what is going on in each other’s lives. When you get so busy, you can really lose each other. We’ve already experienced that, so this is one way that we keep in touch.

Tony: No, there is never really a typical day. As a B-2 pilot and Director of Operations, my job is everything but routine and boring. I am constantly making decisions and resolving challenges. I fly weekly and have lots of team meetings. Most of my time is spent on planning and scheduling. A solid plan and schedule usually leads to a successful mission.

As a restaurant owner, I am coordinating with employees and team leaders on various issues. My primary responsibility is paying the bills and team building. To be successful in business you have to have a good product and know how to market it. It is a constant challenge and you have to have thick skin to run a restaurant! You also have to love dealing with people.

As a new author, I thoroughly enjoy sharing our experiences with the hope that we will help and inspire others. God is central to my life and I rely on His protection and guidance.

Annie: Let’s talk about that restaurant a little bit, Monetti’s—how does the story start?

Penny: We had just come back from Italy, being stationed overseas, and because you’re only allowed to take one car overseas, Tony had his other car stored at his brother’s home inIndiana. We lived inMissouri, so we took a road trip to Indiana to pick up the car.

On the last day we were there, Tony went out with his brother on an errand. While they were out, they must have had a huge discussion, because once they came home, I heard Giuliano (my brother-in-law) say to his wife, “Guess what? We’re starting a restaurant with them. Get packed because we’re moving to Warransburg.” While Tony and I were in Italy, they had discussed how nice it would be to have a restaurant together!

My sister-in-law is very organized and very structured, and though she had doctor appointments and even a tonsillectomy scheduled for her son, in an hour and a half, she had the whole place packed and the doctor’s appointments rearranged.

We had no beds in our house in Missouri because our things hadn’t gotten back from Italy, so we all literally slept on the floor. But they found the building for the restaurant. It was an old video store that my brother-in-law had seen in a dream. He knew this was it and so we started the restaurant. This is my spontaneous family!

Tony: That was in the summer of 2004, so we’ve been open almost seven years now. We were just voted the number 8 unique eatery in the state ofMissouri, so that was quite an honor.

Annie: Tony, what do people say when they hear that you’re an Air Force pilot and a restaurant owner?

Tony: Well, honestly, people are kind of in awe and are like, “How can you do that?” How am I able to be the founder of Big Brothers, Big Sisters, president of the Lion’s Lake Initiative, teach at the university on weekends, run a restaurant, and do all these other things? I almost died a few years ago, so I try to live my life as if every day was the last one. If you live your life with that kind of attitude and that kind of passion, if you give it all you’ve got, you can do a lot more than you think. I don’t waste time playing video games and watching TV a lot; I am a very disciplined person. I get up every morning and I read the Bible, I pray with my wife, I work out, and I go over my goals, which I have written down in the front of my planner. By writing things down and applying the S.M.A.R.T. principle (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and a time bound), you’re able to achieve goals. If you don’t have a plan and you don’t have a vision for where you want to go, what you want to be, you’re just going to fly all around. As a pilot, before you take off, you plan, and if you have a good plan, you’ll get to where you want to go.

Penny: I also want to share something that we’ve never really shared with many people. The restaurant has been a really big part our life. I didn’t want to get involved at first because I knew what owning a restaurant did to people: you’re “married to it” and “have no life,” and because of all of this, I told Tony, “The only way that I am going to be able to be excited about this restaurant is if we make it a ministry.” So my approach was that we would pray. I would go into work and pray that the Lord would reveal to me who needed help that day. Homeless people have come through that are now not homeless; prostitutes have come through; we’ve had Wiccan people come through, and I’ve had a chance to witness to many and hopefully display through our lives and our family what it is to have Christ in your life. For most of these stories I’ll never know the ending, but about three years ago, I gave a Bible to one of our guys that is Wiccan. He continues to talk to me periodically, and that alone might be what we’ve been here for.

Tony: But let’s be clear: you’ve got to be a little crazy to own a restaurant—and we are!

Annie: Have your daily lives changed since you wrote this book? Like your three interviews just today, for example?

Tony: I don’t think they’ve changed much. We’ve always led a very active life as far as being involved in a lot of things, and if anything, it has just made us stronger in our relationship.

Penny: The thing that is really neat about it is that we’ve done more things together. We love to do community projects together, but as far as “his work” and “my work,” it puts us in separate realms. With the book especially, since it is built on relationships within the military life, we’re working together on it, and so that’s been a great aspect. We’re in the same room a lot, which is nice.

Annie: Yes, and having people like me asking you questions about the details of your lives must be interesting!

Tony: It’s fun, though, and I really think that it’s strengthened our marriage if anything. As you know, we are really transparent in that book. We made ourselves vulnerable to open our lives up in the way we have, but I think it’s important that we are honest with ourselves and with our readers—what you see is what you get, you know?

Annie: Yes, and that’s one of the things that when I read the book really struck me as very important to you guys. Your level of vulnerability made you both more credible in my eyes. What you write in your book isn’t fake; it is very real.

Penny: And I tell you, we really talked a lot about that too. We use the word “sex” in the book! Before we began this project, Tony and I were talking, and we agreed that we’d have to be real because otherwise we’re not approachable. So that’s what we tried to do.

Annie: Let’s talk about your family a little bit—tell me about your kids.

Tony: My oldest son, Nico, just graduated from college with honors and is an outstanding writer. His college has an award for screenwriting, and he won that award for a script he wrote. He’s also an actor and starring in a movie called Sincerely Forever and we’re really excited about that. He’ll be going for his masters next—he’s very self-motivated and knows what he wants to do.

My middle son, Antonio, recently signed the dotted line and begins Army training in a few weeks. He’ll go through basic training first this summer, and then he’ll go through ROTC. He wants to eventually become an officer, but he wanted to get a feel for what it is like to be enlisted prior to becoming an officer. As of right now, he plans on making a career out of the military. He is in for at least six years. For the life of me I cannot understand why anyone in their right mind would pick the Army over the Air Force, but that is another story for another day!

Gabriella is my smallest; she’s fourteen and wonderful. She’s the president of her class, a straight-A student, a soccer player, and just a great person—I love her to pieces.

Annie: What would you say to other young people who are contemplating joining the military, like your son just did?

Tony: I’d tell them to do it. I encourage all young people to serveAmericain one form or another so as to gain a greater appreciation for whatAmericameans and offers. We are blessed to live here. The military service offers many benefits that will help you later in life. Teamwork, leadership, character development, and a sense of purpose are just a few of the benefits, not to mention the many educational opportunities the Department of Defense offers. Your life will take on a new meaning when you are part of a unique team dedicated to protecting America and her values. I would do it all over again if I could! In fact, after I retired I was asked if I was interested in returning to the USAF as part of a military voluntary recall, and I did!

Annie: War is a tricky subject for Christians who are commanded not to murder. What are your thoughts on pacifism and war?

Tony: I think it is fair to say that American military men and women are not eager to fight, but we will do so to perform our mission. In our book I explain the story of a rabbi’s tattoos and the effect they had on my life. When he showed me the tattoos that the Nazis put on his forearm like he was a head of cattle, I understood at a very young age why it is necessary to confront evil head on and defeat it before it defeats you. Unfortunately, in this world, evil men and regimes do exist and must be confronted.

Annie: Whose idea was it to write a book about your experiences as a military couple?

Tony: It was Penny’s idea. She went to a Marantha Christian writers’ conference and came up with the idea after some reflection and divine intervention. She tells the story so well. In a nutshell, one of the speakers suggested that if you do write, it is best to have expertise in the area you are writing about. As Penny reflected on that, she asked herself, “What do I know well?” and then the idea occurred that she knows military service as a spouse for over twenty years. She then heard another couple speak (husband and wife) on a project they were working on together and it dawned on her that we should write a book together from a warrior and a spouse perspective on military life. I was working on writing another book, and Penny knew that I had a passion for motivational speaking, so she suggested that we commit this idea to our Lord and see where it takes us. The rest, as they say, is history!

Annie: Tony and Penny, I had a marvelous time speaking with you—you encouraged me immensely during our chat, and I appreciate you opening up your lives to me and many others! Blessings on your future! 

To find out more about Called to Serve or to purchase your copy, head over here.

Called to Serve, an Excerpt

God’s Got My Twelve

Learning to Trust God

The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ~Philippians 4:5–7

The bus’s icy wipers fought to cling to the frozen windshield. Twelve anxious spouses from the 668th B-52 Bomb Squadron, stationed in Rome, New York, loaded their coat-covered, pajama-clad, sleepy-eyed toddlers and young children onto the navy blue bus. The engine’s loud revving pierced the eerie midnight silence. The bus’s tires furrowed fresh tracks on the snow-covered road that bordered the gloomy Air Force runway. The squadron commander had arranged a rare opportunity for spouses and children to bid their warriors goodbye, possibly for the last time, before they departed for a brewing war.

We pulled onto the tarmac where a massive green KC-135 refueling plane created the backdrop for a bustle of military activity. My then two-year-old son suddenly burst out from his drowsiness, “That Daddy, Mommy! Daddy fly his co-plane!” Nico pointed to the sea of flight suits and leather bomber jackets. Any soldier wearing the olive-green uniform was dubbed daddy. Crew members cracked many a joke when Nico mistook one of them for his father. The runway floodlights illuminated an assembly line of daddies passing their flight bags down the line, up a metal stairway, and into the plane’s belly like a well-conducted symphony. I thought, Can’t you guys load slower? The deployment happened so quickly.

Only two days earlier my husband, Tony, received open-ended orders to a location he could not share with me. His deployment would last six months to a year—time would tell. Tony started preparing me for this day three years ago, before we married. Serving in combat is the reality of joining the military, but every warrior and military family hopes that conflict will never happen. However, war in Iraq knocked at our country’s door, and the US military hastily answered.

The countdown to his departure prompted trips to obtain life insurance, create a will, and grant power of attorney—just in case. Tony had promised Nico a campout when the weather warmed. Even though the fire hydrants lay buried under the January snow, Tony bought an orange, four-man tent to fulfill his promise. He transformed our living room into a campsite complete with s’mores, flashlights, and popcorn. I held back tears as my son excitedly rolled his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles sleeping bag next to his father’s not-so-exciting blue sack. Later when Nico danced and sang his mixed-up rendition of “Jingle Bells,” our laughter mingled with tears. Our unspoken words blasted the same thought: Will this be the last time?

Tony’s crew finished loading the bags as the dreaded moment neared. Did he have to walk toward us so fast? Slow down! Nico leaped up into his daddy’s arms. Tony and I clung to each other tightly, sandwiching Nico in an embrace. I can’t remember the words spoken, just that I didn’t want to let go of the man who was the crux of my existence and the heartbeat of our family. The commander’s orders to board ended our goodbye. As the crew of daddies filtered onto the plane, our small group of spouses hugged our children closer. Hoping he could still see us standing alongside the runway, Nico and I waved at the tanker that taxied both Tony and me into unknown territory.

Along with my first deployment goodbye, I was introduced to the military spouse’s troublesome trio: fear, uncertainty, and worry. If military spouses and family members leave these emotions unattended, they will become the unwanted houseguests that never leave. Yet, we greet these mental home wreckers at our mind’s door, offer them our favorite recliner, and entertain them until we are mentally, physically, and spiritually drained. They startle us from a good dream, race our heartbeat, and steal away valuable rest so we become short-tempered with our family and coworkers.

The tormenting trio of emotions is destructive. I glued myself to the news channels, which broadcasted new fears continually. Footage of allied planes blasting Iraq with bombs played on every station. I watched carefully to see if I recognized any B-52s in the mix. Televised images of a battered, bloody American taken prisoner by Iraqi soldiers saturated the news and haunted my dreams. Would I see my husband’s face simulcast on every station like this poor man? My heart poured out sympathy for him and his family. I wondered whether I could handle their situation. Within weeks dishes stacked up, laundry towered, and sleep rarely visited my bed. The ulcers lining my gums caused by worry inflicted so much pain that I struggled to eat solid food and sought medical help.

Military friends invited me regularly to a Friday evening Bible study. Each time I politely excused myself thinking, Who holds Bible studies on Friday nights? Although I had accepted Christ as my Savior three years earlier, praying with others in someone’s living room was as far out of my comfort zone as my annual PAP smear. I was raised to believe faith was a private issue, not something you shared with others, and certainly not with a group. However, one night a study member caught me off-guard and, once again, invited me. I agreed to attend. During the meeting, as individuals presented their worry-related prayer requests, a strange wave of comfort rushed over me. I wasn’t alone. We all faced the same anxiety. I detected in them a peace I craved, and I prayed for the first time that God would grant me that peace. I soon realized that although I believed in a powerful God, I didn’t trust Him with my daily worries or ask guidance for decisions Tony normally handled. Through studying the Bible and praying with fellow Christians, I learned that no concern was too small for God. Bible Study Fridays soon became my favorite event of the week. I bundled up my fears and finally abandoned them at God’s doorstep.

From that day forth, instead of entertaining fear, I focused on maintaining my physical health, praying away my anxiety, and planning fun activities to give our spouses’ worry-filled minds a reality break. Lack of sleep had invited anxiety to inhabit my mind. I began to rest when my son napped. I exercised unwanted stress away. When pesky worries tried to pitch camp in my thoughts, prayer booted them out. I attended the Friday Bible study regularly. During the week, I organized mom and kid dates, progressive dinners, and enjoyable outings. A lingerie party for wives became a big hit.

A common military saying that refers to shielding a comrade from harm stems from the numbers on a clock’s face. The twelve represents what lies in front of you and the six signifies what lurks behind. When someone has “got your six,” that means he or she will ward off enemies from behind.

Trusting God offered no guarantee that my husband would come home safely or that life would return to “normal,” but I learned that I didn’t walk alone. God cared about my daily challenges. He not only has my six; He knows what’s ahead. God’s got my twelve, as well.

Lord, thank you for assuring me that I am not alone. You are always near. Help me to cast anxiety at your doorstep and leave it there. When life gets hectic and uninvited worries start to invade, help my family and me experience the peace that comes only through trusting you.

WHAT WORRIES YOU? What steps are you taking to halt anxiety from holding your thoughts hostage? What activities are you participating in to help your physical, spiritual, and emotional condition? Have you invited God to walk beside you?

Resources
Combat Faith and Military Ministry encourage and strengthen Christians’ faith in Jesus Christ. Learn more about these websites in the Resources section in the back of [Called to Serve].

Taken from Called to Serve, © 2011 by Tony Monetti and Penny Monetti. Used by permission of Discovery House Publishers, Box 3566, Grand Rapids  MI 4950l.  All rights reserved

To order a copy of Called to Serve: Encouragement, Support, and Inspiration for Military Families, please click here.

Email CMResource@aol.com or call 800-858-9388, if you work in print or broadcast media or have a professional blog/website and would like a review copy.

Day of Discovery Honored with the Aegis Award in Documentary

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

2010 Aegis Winner

Grand Rapids, MI—Day of Discovery has won a 2010 Aegis Award for the 89-minute video production “The War Within: Finding Hope for Post-Traumatic Stress.” The Aegis Awards competition is the video industry’s premier contest for peer recognition of outstanding video productions and non-network TV commercials.

A distinguished panel of judges, representing industry professionals from around the country, honored “The War Within” in the Documentary category for outstanding production quality.

This documentary from Day of Discovery records the journey of marine veteran Phil Downer and army veteran Mike Wilkins. Through revealing their struggles with post-traumatic stress disorder and the struggles their wives faced, they offer hope for military vets and their families.

“Someone asked me one time, ‘When were you in Vietnam?’ I said, ‘Last night … in my dreams … in my fears.’” ~Phil Downer

For men and women who have fought in a war, the battle does not end when they go home.
Day of Discovery’s four decades of programming make it one of the oldest continually running Christian broadcasts in US television history, first airing on May 5, 1968, as a television ministry of Radio Bible Class (now known as RBC Ministries). Day of Discovery DVDs are distributed by Discovery House Publishers, part of the RBC Ministries family.

RBC Ministries offers and distributes teaching resources to millions worldwide and has offices in 37 countries including the US. Its signature publication, the daily devotional Our Daily Bread, is translated into over 40 languages. RBC Ministries changed its name from Radio Bible Class in 1994 to reflect the growth of services and resources that are offered worldwide.

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